“Daddy Tired”

Let me start by saying this: When you start talking to your kids in third person, saying stuff like “Daddy Tired” or “Daddy Sleepy,” there’s a good chance you’re standing on your last leg. That’s where I’m at right now.

I know what you might say, “Comedy Dad, you hired movers. How could you possibly be tired?” Listen, I’m a 42-year-old stand up comic father with two babies under two. I was tired before we started. So if you add the stress of moving, I’m exhausted.

The weekend started with me driving up to northern Virginia to pick up my mother-in-law in Manassas on Friday, which is a nightmare to say the least. Seven hours up and back…enough said! My knee is still hurting.

And just like clockwork, at 6am after I just returned home from a grueling trip the night before at 11pm, what do I hear?

“Hey Dada.”

It was my son wanting some milk and cartoons. He was right on time because I had overslept for 20 minutes.

I finally got up and went over to the truck rental place to pick up my truck only to find out my reservation only held the rate not the truck. WHAT??!! I wanted to go off but I took three deep breaths. That didn’t work, so I took three more until I finally calmed down.

I went to another truck rental business and found a truck. My movers, M and E Express, were awesome. They loaded me up and through the tunnel and unloaded in five hours. Can I get an amen!

But my weekend wasn’t over. I had to drive my mother-in-law back and my wife had to make an IKEA run to pick up a few new things, plus we still aren’t unpacked. But if you’re a smart married man, you know the best thing to do is just smile and say, “Sure, let’s go babe.”

Now it’s Monday at 8 p.m. and I’m finally home. My wife is asleep, my daughter is fed and changed, and it’s just me and my son sitting on the couch. I’m ashamed to say I snored so loud it woke him up in my lap and he said “Dada bed.”

I looked at him and said, “Yeah TT, Daddy tired.”

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